Ice Dreams
by celticgina
Summary: With Christmas Coming, where can a girl find a little winter and solace in sunny California?  A Christmas gift and wish for the GRIGSBY crowd.  One shot.  R&R Please?


**No, I really haven't disappeared! This one is for Schnerb, who nagged, cajoled and outright guilted me into getting this done! **

**I am still working on Unfortunate. Combination of real life and annoyance at how our ship has been treated has really stalled the story bunnies. I hope this inspires a few more of you to start your fingers!**

**Merry Everything and God Bless us Everyone!**

**ICE DREAMS**

The chill of the air was always a shock after the warmer California weather. It was nothing like home, of course, but still, it felt good. She smiled sadly as she laced up her skates. This time of year was always hard on her. She loved being on her own, but the time from Thanksgiving to New Year's was tough when she couldn't get home. She loved her independence and her job but still, it would be better to be with family this year, especially since… No, she would not let herself wallow in pity. She had made the right choice.

Skating had always been a favorite past time for her. She had pictures of herself and her mom on the ice from the time she was very little. When she was in Junior high, it was the place to be on a Friday or Saturday. She didn't go so much in High School, but would always stop and skate in college when the stresses built. Some things never changed for Grace Van Pelt. The upset when she discovered she wasn't going to have enough time off for a trip back to Iowa this year only compounded the sense of loss. Breaking up was always tough. But better to be alone than in a relationship for the wrong reason.

Stop, Grace. Stop it now. She didn't come here to think about that. She came for a little exercise and to clear her mind. She came to remind herself that even in California, a winter tradition could still be found. Shaking her sense of sadness off, she headed toward the ice. The crowd wasn't too bad. Some adolescent boys stole hats and scarves from girls. Those girls pretended to be affronted. Some things never changed. A few mothers were helping to hold up over bundled preschoolers. Some would-be Olympians tried out spins in center ice. But it was a tall solitary figure that caught her eye and stole her breath.

In a pair of well fitting jeans, and San Diego PD hoodie, he was gliding around, lost in thought. She had brought him here last year. Her California boy had never ice skated. At first, he was nervous and a little awkward. But quickly, his athleticism had shown through. The big man who moved with such a natural grace despite his size, found his balance very fast. She suspected after the first time, he had come back and practiced on his own. Pretty soon, this became a favorite for them both. It was a fun way to burn some calories before a meal and a few drinks. Of course, after that, they always burned more calories with another indoor activity. His strength and athleticism stood him in good stead there as well, she remembered.

For a long moment, she allowed herself to just watch him, hidden by the entrance to the rink. It was a luxury she had given away months ago. His hands were in his pockets and even though he seemed to be just slowly gliding, his strength and long legs ate up the ice quickly. After months of forcing herself not to look too long, her greedy eyes gave this gift to the rest of her body. When he spun around in the corner and began to skate backwards, she had to swallow a sob. She vividly remembered the day she taught him to do that. Once he figured out the rhythm and balance of it, he laughed in delight. Those big open smiles of his were burned onto her the retinas of her heart. She remembered being surprised by the warmth of his hands as he skated backwards pulling her along.

A parent and toddler came off the ice, interrupting her reverie with a strident demand for Hot Chocolate. That stirred even more memories. They would take a break and split a hot chocolate and sneak delicious kisses before heading back out onto the ice. She hadn't been able to drink it since.

She debated whether she should just turn around and take off the skates. He hadn't seen her. No harm, no foul. She could find another rink. She was too fragile to see him now. Yes, that was it, she would just leave.

The scratch of the blades, splash of the ice shavings and his cologne assaulted her senses all at once. He had come to a halt in front of her. Too late to retreat now.

"Grace?"

Oh God, no that voice. It was a little scratchy, slightly husky and just a little surprised. But it was the tiny glimmer of happiness that almost broke her. Even after all this, he was still happy to see her. The man was a wonder. The sound reverberated down her spine as if he had shouted. The impact was just as strong.

"Wayne! Hello. I didn't know you skated still."

The words trailed off as she realized how it sounded. His eyes had widened and then shuttered. But she saw the hurt her words had inflicted. He thought she didn't think he should skate anymore, and certainly not here. Damn. She had forgotten how fragile he was under all that apparent strength. His head went down a little and his shoulders hunched. That glimmer of happiness in those open eyes had been shattered. Damn.

"Sorry. I guess I should have realized. I'm almost done anyway. I'll just go."

"No! Wayne! God No! Don't leave because of me. I was just surprised to see you. You looked good out there. Nice to see you kept at it. You could probably handle hockey now."

His head lifted and his eyes softened at the joke. She used to tell him she was going to make a hockey player out of him. He used to joke back that he really wanted to be figure skater. It was one of those silly little things couples would whisper and smile to each other.

They shared a silent smile together, bound by the memory. Their eyes met and held. The rink and its noises faded for a moment as without a word, their connection flared back to life. He held out his big hand to her.

"Skate with me?"

She started to put her hand in his, almost without thinking. Then she hesitated a moment. He saw it and swore to himself. If she had brought him here, Wayne was leaving and throwing the ice skates away. The roar of jealousy held down so long engulfed him. He wouldn't be able to bear it if she had brought him to one of their spots.

"You're not alone?"

The question slid out of his tightly held lips before he could stop it. He might want to bellow with anger over another man holding what he still loved, but he would not allow her to be upset by it. Her eyes met his, welled with tears.

"Yes I am alone. It's over. I broke it off."

He was torn between exultant joy at the news and fury that the bastard had hurt Grace. That was not acceptable. He forced himself to take a deep breath and remain calm.

"Are you OK?"

Not trusting her voice entirely, she shook her head. Grace placed her hand in the one he had kept outstretched. His fingers tightened around hers. She had always loved the simple act of holding his hands. They were always warm. The strength in them was always tempered by gentle touch. It felt safe and good. She was probably being a selfish bitch allowing him to comfort her this way. She raised her eyes from their entwined hands and saw him looking down at them too. His smile grew. The warmth from that smile and his hands unfurled something she had held tightly wound within herself for months now. She had almost forgotten how it felt to really trust someone.

He wisely said nothing, but pulled her out onto the ice. Within a few strokes of their blades, they were skating together in perfect unison. They held both their hands together in front of them, and matched glide for glide. Halfway around, they looked at each other and smiled. It was one of pure happiness. Each had forgotten how in this, like in other activities, they matched and melded together so well.

They skated together for a long while, saying nothing. Each was just so caught up in how good and right this felt. They were afraid to break the spell. He finally took the plunge.

"Hot chocolate?"

"Yes, please."

They both knew this would be treading on dangerous ground for them. The memories of those chocolate flavored kisses haunted him as well. But, he knew he had to do something. She was here. She was alone. She had broken it off. He had to know. They found that corner behind a bank of lockers where they used to sit. There was a high ledge for the window that was the perfect height for him to lean against. She used to luxuriate in leaning against him, knowing his strength would hold her up. It was an oddly intimate way to drink their hot chocolate. This time, he leaned back and she leaned against the lockers. She felt she lost that right months back. His eyebrows rose just a little at her choice.

They sipped the sweet beverage for a long moment in a comfortable silence. Each was remembering other times. Each was longing for those moments again. Each was trying to decide what to say. Typically, Wayne broke the silence.

"Grace?"

The one word question said it all. She knew what he wanted to know. Maybe it was better to tell him here, away from the prying ears and eyes. He had the right to hear it here first, so he could be ready with his reactions. Jane and Cho would be watching him like a hawk.

"It was kind of mutual I guess. I discovered that he thinks monogamy is over rated. I don't think I am comfortable with that kind of guy."

What she didn't tell him was the fight where she accused him of sleeping around. Or where he said she was a Mid-Western frozen bitch that was still hung up on her wimpy boyfriend. She had thrown him out of the apartment and told him to fuck off. Insulting her was bad enough. When he started on Wayne, she saw red. He didn't need to know that.

"That arrogant asshole was sleeping around on _you_?"

The incredulity in his voice was a balm to her battered ego. For Wayne's part, he was caught between blind fury and astonishment that any man who was lucky enough to be with Grace would want more. The tight lips and glistening eyes said she was more important than beating the crap out of the prick.

"For your sake, I am sorry. You deserve better. Are you ok?"

She smiled wanly at him. He was a wonder. She could tell by his clenched fists that he wanted to kill Craig. But his protective instincts made him worry for her more. How had she let him go?

"I'll be fine, I guess. I was trying to move on, like you did. I guess I have to work at it better."

"You think I have moved on? What? You mean with those women? Truth? I hate them a little."

"Wayne! Hate is such a strong emotion."

"You're right. I don't care enough about them to hate them. I kind of hate myself. What the hell is wrong with me? Do I really think I am going to find what I had? What we had. They were all place holders at best. I was pretending to myself that they would help. It didn't. Jane was right. I was working out like crazy. They would come up to me. It sucked."

The revelations spilling out of him. She was shocked. The misery etched on his normally happy face tore at her heart. Of course women were approaching him. What red-blooded woman wouldn't? He was gorgeous, and in workout mode must have caused perspiration that had nothing to do with exercise.

"I am never going to love…never mind. I shouldn't say anything I guess."

It was the sweet, slightly shy and uncertain Wayne she remembered. The gentle giant she had fallen for in the beginning. Her hand instinctively went to his arm in a gesture of comfort. The muscles under the hoodie were even bigger than she remembered. Apparently the working out was effective. Her hand began to slide down the arm in a caress. His whole body stilled.

Her touch was heaven and hell. Skating with her, the scent of her hair under his nose teased him. Her hands in his were a torment. And now, she was sliding her hand up and down his arm. She probably meant it as a comfort, but it felt like a caress. His body believed the second and responded accordingly. His mind was whirling with the meaning. Was she giving him a signal?

Time stopped as they looked at her hand. When their eyes finally met, he noticed a smudge of chocolate right by her upper lip. It wasn't quite a chocolate moustache. It was adorable. He gave into his urges and leaned forward to taste the sample off her lip.

As his head came closer and closer, she knew what he was intending. He used to kiss the cocoa off her mouth all the time. It usually led to a few more kisses before a sense of decorum forced a halt. She tightened her hand on his arm, anchoring herself to the strongest thing she could find. She had a feeling she would need that anchor. Just before his lips touched hers, she heard him say her name in a cross between a breath and a groan. It was low and tender and the sexiest thing she had ever heard. Laced with need, it was a question and a command. She closed the difference of the two inches between them.

Oh, God. She had almost forgotten how well this man could kiss. It was a study in sexy contrasts. His lips were soft and gentle and yes firm and demanding. His hands cupped her face like it was the most delicate of china while holding her completely at his command. And when his tongue came out to trace and lick the chocolate off her lips, she tightened her grip on his large bicep and melted toward him. It was all he needed. One arm slid down from her face and banded around her waist. He hauled her up firmly against him, never breaking the kiss.

The part of her brain that was functioning was registered how well they fit together after all this time. Her arms stretched up around his neck to pull him closer. She was hanging onto him. Even bent over a little, her weight stretched against his. He held her easily.

When Grace realized the sounds were coming from her throat, she forced herself to pull back a bit. They were in a public place, albeit in a private corner they had used often before for just such a reason. She could feel him hard against her. While she reveled in the long missed feelings it was producing in her, she knew they couldn't just do this. Her body screamed at her brain to shut up.

He felt her pulling away. Though he wanted nothing more than to haul her away to somewhere private to finish what their bodies had started, he would never push her. It went against his nature. He allowed his body to compromise by keeping one long arm wrapped loosely around her waist. He would let her go for now, but not too far.

"Wayne…"

"Shh. Let me go first. You need to know. I was going to call you tonight, but didn't want to disturb you with, well, I didn't want to disturb you."

Her eyes shut briefly in acknowledgment of what he meant. Having a phone conversation with Wayne about work while Craig was there was always awkward. Any other kind would have been impossible.

"I came here to relax. I have made a decision. Lisbon is getting my transfer request in the morning."

"No! Wayne! You mustn't!"

"Relax, grace, it's not about that. Well, not completely."

He could never lie to her, she thought. His open face always gave him away. She used to laugh at how he could convince a suspect of anything. She knew in an instant when he was bluffing.

"I was offered a spot in a new unit that's being formed. They will deal with the aftermath of explosions and incendiary devices in the state. Between terror threats and the availability of this crap on line, it's become more common. Arson for profit is over. Our capabilities in catching them are too high. But with my training, I was asked to be part of this unit."

"You're leaving?"

She tried to keep her voice calm, but the floor seemed to be tilting suddenly. It was hard enough to see him all the time. She couldn't imagine not seeing him at all.

"Well, just the unit. The new E & I unit will be based here. L.A. wanted it, but the AG insisted that it be in the capitol. He wants to handle more stuff without the Feds involved. Can't say that I disagree there."

Her wry smile at that last statement mirrored his. Now that she was broken up with Craig, working with the FBI would be a bit uncomfortable. She was sure there would all act professional, but it would be a little awkward. The fight had been acrimonious. One of her biggest fears was how he would behave afterward.

"But, Wayne, to leave Serious Crimes?"

"I know. Normally, this wouldn't seem like a career path. But when you are personally handpicked by the Director and AG, well, you don't say no. And it would be easier for me, personally."

"Wayne, I am sorry."

"I understand you think you did the best thing for us both breaking up. I will say this once, Grace. I was more hurt that you didn't believe in us, in me and in our love than anything. I am not transferring because of you. But not having to watch you with other men all the time is a personal benefit."

"Other men? Yeah, I am sure. Once Craig tells everyone he dumped me for being a cold bitch…"

Oh crap. Did she just let that slip out? Glancing up at his suddenly thunderous face, she had. She went to calm him quickly. Wayne had always been fiercely protective.

"Wayne, stop. It doesn't matter. He said all kinds of crap and so did I. It's over and he is over. I don't care."

Her hands had come up to his face to cup it. Her touch alone calmed him and her words soothed his immediate rage. Without thinking, her thumbs stroked the raspy roughness of his evening beard. Suddenly, she remembered the feel of that against her body. The memory had her melting against him.

He could feel the change in her body. They were always so attuned to each other. He had learned long ago to take advantage what life gives you. Grace in his arms where she belonged, caressing his cheek and leaning against him, was a gift. He leaned down and swiftly kissed her hard. She was broken up with the jerk. He was moving to another unit. And unless he was a complete idiot, she still felt something pretty strong.

"Ewwww!"

It was strident voice behind Grace, about 2 feet down that brought them back to reality. They looked to see a little boy, roughly 5 or so, his face scrunched in an agony of disgust commenting on them.

"That's just gross. If you chew her face off, Santa won't bring you nothing."

She could feel the laughter threatening to explode as it rumbled in his chest. He let her go and bent down to the boy's height.

"Sorry, Buddy. If you see Santa, tell him I will be better, ok?"

The little boy considered the very big man carefully. After a long moment, he shrugged and nodded. "I don't know how you get out of that one, but you better just stick to sharing hot chocolate. Kelsey Wickham likes it when I do that." His sage life and dating advice dispensed, the boy ran off.

The happy giggles had Wayne turning back to Grace. God, he had almost convinced himself she wasn't that beautiful. Her eyes were dancing and she was holding a hand over her mouth to keep from laughing too loud. She looked relaxed and happier than he had seen her in too long.

As much as he wanted to take up where they were, the mood had been decidedly broken. Instead he straightened and held out his hand.

"Skate with me? Don't leave?"

Grace looked at the big hand and the man attached. Something she had been holding for far too long tight inside unfurled and warmed. He was asking her to skate, but she knew the second question was much more. His expressive blue eyes showed her the windows to his soul, for sure. They reflected the love she had carelessly tossed aside. He was still steadfast. In a moment of insight, she knew he always would be. Christmas music piped over the loudspeaker helped suspend this moment for her.

She took a deep breath and put her hand in his. The universe had spoken. She was given her second chance. She wasn't throwing this away.

"I'm never going anywhere again."

**Before you all ask, this is just a long oneshot. But reviews are appreciated, if just to let me know you are still all there?**


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